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The children of Aurium

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ObliviJohn

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The children of Aurium

PostMon Mar 07, 2016 4:53 pm

Hello. I've been waiting for half a year for an opportunity to post my homemade DzC story in the competition thread.
No topic really fit, and lately we've been left to our own devices so I'll post the story anyway.
I wrote it when I was starting up and had very little knowledge of the existing DzC lore. Some of the names are unfortunate. Anyways, hope you like it.


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Year: 2656

Humanity has been pushed to the very edge of the the original territories. Earth and the cradle worlds have fallen and rebuilding is slow.
One planet remains strong however, Aurium.
Image
Rich on natural resources and well defended in a triad of planets as the little sister planets Auriel and Andiem are heavily fortified.
But the main reason for Auriums wellfare is the renown academy of war that is the centre of it's military progress.
The academy, named Eclipse, has trained the finest generals of the UMC for over two centuries.
Image
The most recognized of all generals however have come from the Berriath family. No family can claim such a number of victories with such minimal losses.

This year, the Eclipse received a new pupil of the Berriath family. Sullivan Berriath, son of Emilia Berriath whom in her years as a general has tallied the most victories at her age in the history of the Eclipse academy.
Sullivan shows as much promise as his mother, entering the academy at the head of his class. A great hope for humanity.

Year: 2659

Three years into his training Sullivan delivered brilliant results as anticipated. Undefeated by his peers and even by some of his seniors.
But Sullivans progress, as well as fame, has yielded him rivals. The most prominent being Aryon Vega.
Vega has the promise to become a great general and, had he not stood in the shadow of Sullivan, would have earned himself a name within the academy.
Thus, Aryon challenges the young Berriath at every given chance.
At the fall of year 2659 the scourge pressure culminates into a massive offensive pushing so far as to overrunning the defences of Auriel before being driven back only through brilliant tactical manouvers by general Emilia.
The situation is dire and the pressure on the academy to deliver is greater than ever.

Year: 2661

With one year remaining of Sullivans education a monumental loss shakes Aurium. General Emilia falls while defending Andiem.
Sullivans education is cut short as he is called into action, much to the agitation of Aryon.
Shortly thereafter the Aurians are forced to abandon the defences at Andiem pulling all armed forces back into a joint defence of Aurium.
Sullivan manages to maintain the defences as the scourge throws themselves again and again into dauntless assaults on the planets defences.
It seems a hopeless struggle against the unending forces of the scourge.

Year: 2663

Having graduated from Eclipse, Aryon is enlisted as a lieutenant under Sullivan.
But as he is given command of his first unit, the forces of the scourge suddenly pull back.
Apprehensive celebrations are taken up but a worry as to why the sudden retreat was initiaded unsettles the leading parties of the army.

Year: 2664

Scientist find the reason behind the sudden scourge retreat.
A massive meteorite is set to collide with Aurium. The given time until collision is two years. The planet is deemed to becom inhabitable after impact.
A plan is set in motion to migrate all inhabitants of Aurium and possible new homeplanets are concidered.

Year: 2665

Led by general Sullivan the main body of the aurians depart on an exodus from Aurium.
Left behind is lieutenant Vega with part of the military force aswell as a working crew. Their mission is to break down the remaining parts of civilization on Aurium and then follow the central force in search of new soil.

Year: 2666

Aryons mission is concluded and, three weeks before impact, the posterior forces abandon Aurium.
Following the trajectory of Sullivan they are left with the final view of their homeplanets annihilation.
Image

Year: 2667

On their way to catching up with Sullivan, Vegas forces run into a scourge force.
Aryon earns his first win outside the computer simulated battles at the Eclipse but at a price as the cargo ships suffer heavy losses.

Year: 2668

Anguish strikes the Aurians as they catch up to the Sullivan spearhead.
The force has been utterly destroyed. Before them lies gigantic graveyard in space as the population of a planet floats dead in the nothingness.
Image

Drifting through the wreckage they finally find the command ship but boarding it Sullivans body is nowhere to be found.
Image

With their own supplies lost Aryons detachment are forced to gather what they can find of among the wreckage.
Naming themselves 'The children of Aurium' they settle onto a nearby moon to recover and to find a new destination. To find a home.

Aryon finally recognized how arrogant his rivalry had been, when the stakes was millions of people.
And he could not help but fear that the scourges greatest victory in all this, was the aquisition of a military mastermind.
For what if Sullivan had been taken alive, into the hands of the scourge minders.
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georgewashington1794

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Re: The children of Aurium

PostMon Mar 07, 2016 5:16 pm

Nice story ObliviJohn. I really like the timeline style of it. I like the twist of a planet-killing asteroid hurtling at Aurium to make even the indomitable Scourge say, "No thanks!" I want to know what happens next. How many people does Aryon have left? Were any survivors recovered from Sullivan's force who may be able to give an account of what happened? And where, indeed, is Sullivan?

The pictures add greatly to the story telling. Very reminiscent of the rulebooks. Did you create them yourself?

I hope you get the chance to post it in the competition at some point. However, I do recommend making some revisions in order to better fit the existing lore of DzC. Such as, the UCM has not existed for 200 years at this point so Eclipse could not have been training them that long, and for a frontier world it is remarkably developed (based on the second picture).

Good job.
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Tristan

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Re: The children of Aurium

PostMon Mar 07, 2016 8:13 pm

I've had the chance of reading your fluff before as well and as before I say it again- I like it. It's the beginnings of a bigger story. Also a question about Auriel and Andiem, what happened to them after the impact? They seem like a obvious place to retreat to? Give us more.

Cheers,
Tristan.
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ObliviJohn

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Re: The children of Aurium

PostWed Mar 09, 2016 11:47 am

georgewashington1794 wrote:Nice story ObliviJohn. I really like the timeline style of it. I like the twist of a planet-killing asteroid hurtling at Aurium to make even the indomitable Scourge say, "No thanks!" I want to know what happens next. How many people does Aryon have left? Were any survivors recovered from Sullivan's force who may be able to give an account of what happened? And where, indeed, is Sullivan?

The pictures add greatly to the story telling. Very reminiscent of the rulebooks. Did you create them yourself?

I hope you get the chance to post it in the competition at some point. However, I do recommend making some revisions in order to better fit the existing lore of DzC. Such as, the UCM has not existed for 200 years at this point so Eclipse could not have been training them that long, and for a frontier world it is remarkably developed (based on the second picture).

Good job.


Thank you. =)

The survivors numbers are just under 500 000. Almost no children are amongst them, ironic given their taken name.
Aryon set out a year after the main body and thus if there were any survivors they were dead or gone by the time the caught up to them.
The pictures are taken from devian art, I'm sure I broke some internet rule linking them like this. :oops:
Were I to post the story I guess I'd change the age of the academy, the pictures I would take out, it feels like it's the storytelling what the contest is about.

Very nice comments, thank you sir.

Tristan wrote:I've had the chance of reading your fluff before as well and as before I say it again- I like it. It's the beginnings of a bigger story. Also a question about Auriel and Andiem, what happened to them after the impact? They seem like a obvious place to retreat to? Give us more.

Cheers,
Tristan.


Thank you Tristan, nice to see you here in the forums =)
Auriel and Andiem were to small to really support the ammount of people living on Aurium, they might be rich in minerals but not for sustaining life. Mainly they were military planets. Surely they could return now to populate them, but Vega has driven 'his' people on a crusade.
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Tristan

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Re: The children of Aurium

PostWed Mar 09, 2016 2:56 pm

Right. So they left them behind or scorched them so others couldn't use them? I feel that you have something planned with that in mind later. Will be interesting to see where you takes us!

Cheers,
Tristan.
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Archangelcondor

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Re: The children of Aurium

PostWed Apr 13, 2016 7:41 pm

Great job!

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